Joulupukki's Wish List

Economic recession adjustment policy shakes Finland.

Europa Press - Oulu - 27/04/2010

Local newspaper Kaleva reports that Joulupukki (aka Santa Claus) announced this Monday the final implementation of his new adjustment plan aimed at solving the serious problems that his company, Christmas Oy, is facing due to the economic recession.

"Among the measures adopted, his house will now be available for sub-renting during the Summers in order to make the company more resource efficient. Also, all non-essential elves have been made redundant and

On Vulcanos

Creatures shall be seen on the earth who will always be fighting one with another, with the greatest losses and frequent deaths on either side. There will be no bounds to their malice; by their strong limbs a great portion of the trees of the vast forests of the world shall be laid low; and when they are filled with food, the gratification of their desire shall be to deal out death, affliction, labour, terror, and banishment to every living thing; and from their boundless pride they will desire to rise toward heaven, but the excessive weight of their limbs will hold them down. Nothing shall remain on earth, or under the earth, or in the waters that shall not be pursued, disturbed or spoiled, and that which is in one country removed into another. And their bodies shall be made the tomb and the means of transit of all the living bodies which they have slain.

O earth, why do you not open and hurl them into the deep fissures of thy vast abysses and caverns, and no longer display in the sight of heaven so cruel and horrible a monster.

-From Leonardo da Vinci's notebooks.

Family Theatre

Linus is having a bath, and plays with his plastic fishes in the water.
(Juanmi enters)

Juanmi: Linus, I think you need to wash your hair, it has been a long time since you last did.

Linus: No, my head no... nooo.

J: Yes, I know you don't like to get your head wet, but I really think you have to. Your hair is getting all tangled and you are getting rastas, see? All messed up.

L: Nooooooo...

J: OK, what do you think of this: you go on playing for a while and then we come back and wash your hair very carefully?

L: Yes, yes.

(Juanmi knows, but leaves)

(5 minutes later, Juanmi enters)

Dear Kymmenen #4, English

I love anonymous stuff, they get spicy and juicy. Check this one out:

Dear Kymmenen,

You claim to be an english teacher, arent you ashamed of writing an english even worse than that of

Eastern Breaks

I am aware that the unwritten rules of bloggers specifically forbid not writing for long periods neglecting your readership.

I'm sorry, I was abroad and, you know, it was not my intention.

Besides, except for you and myself, there is no such readership here either. It's hard to really care.

Just bear with me, OK? I have this childhood trauma that makes me afraid of not being loved anymore if I don't keep myself performing up to the expectations.

The paralyzing fear that, precisely and preciously, prevents me from performing up to the expectations.

Aaah, *inhales deeply* the wonderful aroma of everlasting childhood traumas.

Buna Café

I don't feel like writing.

The empty space on my belly
has expanded until filling everything.

Time tables change,
cigarettes stink in my breath,
I feel tired and slow,

Fundamentals

There is a body clutching on my soul.

Everybody can see it hanging,
everybody refers to it as me,
but that's not how it feels.

Black Magic

She bounced rhythmically her head up and down
like one of those old toys found in cheap hotels
and Chinese food stands.

If you looked at her long neck nodding at someone else,
you would notice the quite exaggerated fashion
in which she did it.